It had been a painfully overwhelming week. Deep disappointment with people close and dear to me and their decisions were running through my mind. Decisions that while not mine to make would make for a path that I could only anticipate for them to be difficult and deathly. I was grateful we had enough relationship that they let me know what was going on but also keenly aware they weren’t interested in or swayed by what I had to say. They already knew it.
In the month of February when relationship and love are splashed everywhere, this is a part of love too.
It’s hard in those moments to separate the fear and shame of other’s choices to what you should’ve or could’ve done. I know in my head that’s too much power to give my influence over God’s purpose and plans but it’s often where my thoughts start when it gets difficult.
So as I was swimming in all my thoughts and feelings, I went grocery shopping. Grocery shopping is one of my love languages. I feel very loving and accomplished restacking food in the refrigerator. Seriously. But walking down the produce aisle couldn’t eliminate the criticism, self-doubt, and tears that had more power over me at that moment than any other thought.
So I texted a friend just letting her know I was feeling crushed. I hope you have the kind of core friends who speak candidly into your life. Who will and do talk about anything.
She sent a text back repeating words I had spoken to her. She refreshed my memory that these were my words often repeated not just to her but also to many people.
Nothing is impossible with God.
Sometimes you need to be reminded of what you say because it reveals what and who you love.
Her last text gave me a final encouragement, “Let’s not give up believing. It may take years but who cares? “
As we enter into this month of love, I’m reminding myself and those who share this journey with me about three loves that have my attention.
The source of love that gives me the ability to love no matter the cost.
But the kind of love that God created and demonstrated is a costly one because it involves sacrifice and presence. It’s a love that operates more like a sign language than being spoken outright.
Bob Goff, Love Does
The unreturned love that is still worth pursuing.
If Jesus has taught me anything, it’s that sometimes you really want to know (and love) somebody and it takes them forever to know (and love) you back
Bob Goff, Love Does
The honest love of a friend that speaks truth to get you back on track.
Let’s not give up believing (and loving). It may take years but who cares?
LM
Here’s to many months of loving and being loved.
Beautiful. Vulnerable. and true.
Beautifully written. Such good reminders. Thank you, Mary!
May we encourage one another daily!
Sending you much love, Mary! Thanks so much for sharing!
thank you for sharing and encouraging and reminding us of truth!
Oh the devistation and consequences of very special people making really bad choices and the effects it will continue to have. Sometimes I wish I saw God’s plan in writing.
Sometimes I think it is His Mercy that we do not see that plan. May we all lean in moment by moment in His Presence. Love you C
I love that the text reminded you who you really are as the voices made you doubt and feel lame-o. Wild abandonment — that’s you, and it looks messy sometimes. Smooch!
Thank you, Mary. Very timely. ❤️